House Invasion

So, the past few days have been filled with bugs.

The other night I got eaten alive by mosquitoes while having an evening meeting with a visiting donor. My feet and legs look as if I have painted polka-dots on them.

My bathroom is an ant haven.

And then yesterday I came home and found lizard poop on my bed. (I know that lizards aren't bugs but they are in that same annoying, moves to fast, makes me sick, list of yucky things)

All to be out done last night at 5am. I had been sleeping soundly - as soundly as you sleep while you worry that a lizard is defecating on or under your bed - but regardless, I was sleeping. Suddenly the most horrifying sound woke me up - I sat straight up in bed.

It sounded like a fire alarm. SHRIEKING!

But we don't have fire alarms. This is africa, lets be serious.

What else could sound like a fire alarm? My appliances consist of a toaster and a fridge. Could it be my night askari, Fabi, sending some sort of emergency whistle?

Then is came to me. I know that sound. I have heard it at RVCV. A bat!!!!!!! Popo in Swahili.

So I got out of bed and went into the hallway. The noise intensified and was almost deafening - no exaggeration I swear - my ears were vibrating! It must be dying I thought - maybe rabies?

The sound was obviously coming from the guest room. So I went and yelled for Fabi, gave him a broom, a box, and a towel and explained that he needed to procure the bat and remove it.

He agreed. I went and hid in my room.

After about ten minutes of banging and crashing and swearing n Swahili, the sound stopped. Fabi exited the room and called to me. I peered around the corner of my door - not sure if seeing the bat was such a good idea - but there in between Fabi's two fingers was a

CRICKET!!!!!

For the love of god, how can a cricket make that much noise?

Obviously one of the wonders of the world.

Thank God for Fabi!